Missed Connections: Game Over

A reader sent this Missed Connection from the Evansville Craigslist today and I can honestly say it is, at the same time, the greatest and most horrific thing I have read in a long time. This thing is completely NSFW, so be warned.

This one is so raunchy, I don’t even want to post the unedited version on the site. Rather than using asterisks to bleep out the words, I think it’d be far more fun to adjust the verbage much in the way TBS does to my favorite movies.

If you want, you can read the original message uncensored

Potential Tranny Flasher by Simpson’s Supermarket tonight - m4m - 50

I was teaching my step-daughters how to drive, and we were turning into Simpson’s.

You were walking on Covert Avenue wearing a beige trenchcoat and outfit similar to Carmen Sandiego. Although you had long, brunette hair, I knew you had a shopping cart that had my name written all over it.

I got excruciatingly anxious in anticipation for you to checkout as we drove by. I wanted to see those 6-pack abs with the “happy trail” of air leading down that glorious aisle. Haha, we couldn’t have done anything anyway because I had to sit down for 30 minutes shortly thereafter! I re-read some of the TVGuide!!